I’ve come to the point in my life where I need glasses. Nothing too severe, just a pair of ordinary reading glasses. Through whatever means—be it simply getting older, abusing my body with wanton reckless abandon, countless hours spent staring vacantly into one kind of pixelated non-reality or another, or a combination of the three—my vision started deteriorating a couple years ago. In the last six to eight months this ocular de-gentrification has progressed at an alarming rate. I find myself squinting at the pages of a book like I was staring directly into the sun. Lowercase n’s and r’s appear to have been born of the same bleary eyed womb. Driving at night has presented some unique difficulties, especially when I’m high. Today I finally did something about it and went shopping for a pair of glasses.
Clearly, you should have just gotten a prescription windshield. Do I have to think of everything?
